C L Bledsoe




Goodbye to Noise




Jesus came through my line at the grocery store. Jesus smelled bad. Maybe it wasn't Jesus. Maybe it was Elvis. Elvis came through my line buying canned sweet peas and soy milk. Elvis was so loud and stinky, the other customers went back to the aisles pretending they'd forgotten something. Elvis tried to pay with a third party check. I told Elvis our policy against this. Elvis was upset. Elvis made me call John, the manager. John has sideburns. They look better on him than they did on Elvis. Maybe it wasn't Elvis. John didn't think so. He wouldn't take the check, even with ID. I didn't see the ID. I forgot to ask. That's why John's the manager and I can't even get a date from Sarah in the bakery. John can't either, though. So there's that.