Jesus came through my
line at the grocery store. Jesus smelled bad. Maybe it wasn't Jesus. Maybe
it was Elvis. Elvis came through my line buying canned sweet peas and soy
milk. Elvis was so loud and stinky, the other customers went back to the
aisles pretending they'd forgotten something. Elvis tried to pay with a
third party check. I told Elvis our policy against this. Elvis was upset.
Elvis made me call John, the manager. John has sideburns. They look better
on him than they did on Elvis. Maybe it wasn't Elvis. John didn't think so.
He wouldn't take the check, even with ID. I didn't see the ID. I forgot to
ask. That's why John's the manager and I can't even get a date from Sarah in
the bakery. John can't either, though. So there's that.